If you can stomach the concept of a Samizdata comments thread, then go to this one and watch the estimable Euan Gray completely destroy the arguments of a dozen swivel-eyed loons.

The slightly sad thing is that the loons don’t even realise…

Not so much a pro-American bigot as an ragingly anti-anti-American bigot: I give you the spectacularly humourless VariFrank.

The scene he outlines: during post-tsunami office banter, European colleague says "haha, George Bush is so dumb, there’s a disaster in the world and he sends an aircraft carrier…". It’s not the best joke in the world: indeed, like David Beckham jokes, it’s funny only because it mocks a pathetic and ridiculous individual.

Varifrank’s response, as he proudly relates, was to point out in laboured detail how American aircraft carriers are great things to send along, because they contain power, hospitals, desalination plants, horny airmen to revitalise the sex tourism industry, etc, followed by a traditional rant about Americans saving Europe in WWII, followed by calling the joke-teller a "sniggering little fuckjob". His colleagues, he relates, fell into an embarassed silence at this. I can believe that this happened, although I don’t think the embarassment was for the reasons he thinks it is.

Had I been there, there’s a reasonable chance I would have broken the silence. "Just fuck off; I’d rather be ruled by Nazis and take my chances with the gas chambers than hear one more sanctimonious cunt bitching about, because some of his relatives fought in a war 60 years ago, he and all his countrymen are morally superior to the rest of the world. The rest of the world doesn’t fucking want you. Go crawl under a rock and die before you fuck anything else up, you fat-arsed dicklord," might have been an option.

(to be fair on the guy, he does admit he’s too dull-witted to write, so perhaps one should cut him some slack…)

"If people can’t imagine that you can hate Saddam and also think a unilateral war and long-term occupation of an Arab country are bad ideas, that is their problem." – Juan Cole explains, in the course of taking down ignorant git Jonah Goldberg.

This is about as basic as it gets.

Incidentally, I have an excellent theory concerning future wars: all decisions to start a war (or ‘pre-empt’, or ‘attack in defence’ – you know, what we did in Iraq and Afghanistan) should go to a referendum. The war goes ahead if a simple majority of voters approve it. Meantime, everyone who votes ‘yes’ is put on a list of people to be conscripted if they’re required for the war effort…

I’m no great fan of Rupert Murdoch’s dominance of UK media. However, for a major political party to sue one of his newspapers during an election campaign is a monumentally stupid move.

It would have been pleasingly fitting if this horrible witch had accidentally hammered herself to death while indulging in her deranged brand of nimbyism:

"[Pete Doherty] had ignored every request to turn down the music. I ran downstairs and shouted at him, roared at him – I don’t even know if I said any actual words – and I just ran at him, waving the hammer…"

There are few sets of people worse than whiny noise-complaining ninnies (indeed, all council noise abatement officers should be replaced by a recorded phone line saying "pull yourself together, you tedious arsehole"); violent noise-complaining ninnies certainly qualify. Go buy some earplugs.

Update: even if Pete Doherty eats babies loudly at unsociable hours while playing Survivor’s Eye Of The Tiger over the screams of their mothers, he’s still less of a cunt than Robbie Williams.

(via Samizdata, who have a particularly stupid take on the story, as one might expect)

Fucking hell, America is a ridiculous place.

(via Nick).

According to Norm, The University of Leiden in the Netherlands uses an extract from Michael Moore’s Stupid White Men in its English grammar test, in which Mr Moore rants about the stupidity of most of his countrymen.

Norm thinks this is outrageous. I think it’s funny.

We mock the Americans for being fat, stupid inbred rednecks. We mock the French for being arrogant, lazy and malodourous; we mock the Germans for being officious and boring; we mock the Scots for being drunk, violent and on the dole. We’re aware it has only a limited basis in reality, but it annoys the relevant group and therefore is worthwhile.

Norm is right to say that there would have been more of a fuss had the university chosen a text that focused on any other nation or group. However, he draws the wrong conclusion from this. Rather than trying to excise anti-Americanism, we should aim to treat people of all nationalities the way we treat the Septics.

Jerusalem Post writer Tom Gross is a wanker of the first order (bugmenot required). He seems to be implying that if you say the Nazi death camps killed a lot of gypsies, that makes you a Holocaust denier.

"The Guardian also couldn’t resist greatly exaggerating the numbers of Roma (Gypsies) who died in the camps. (Perhaps the paper isn’t aware that inflating the number of Roma and homosexuals killed by the Nazis, in order to try to de-emphasize the Jewish centrality of the Holocaust, is now a favorite trick of revisionist historians.)"

I’ve read the Guardian’s coverage around Holocaust Memorial Day. It appears to have no data at all concerning Roma deaths. It does say "(Roma, communists and gays also suffered and died in the camps)", and "Six million Jews died in the Nazi camps, along with millions of others, including Roma gypsies, Soviet prisoners of war, political opponents of the Nazis, homosexuals, beggars, alcoholics and mentally ill and disabled people".

Independent stats suggest that 500,000-1.5 million Roma died in the Holocaust (absolute numbers are hard to come by since the prewar Roma population was fairly definitionally rather hard to count). If I were a gypsy, I’d be strongly inclined to punch Mr Gross in the head.

If you’re having trouble picking your girlfriend’s birthday present, I’d recommend you check out Omni BioTech’s Small Breast Solutions enhancing tea range.

For just $30 per 30 teabags, you too can make your "breast enhancement regime incredibly easy to follow and more enjoyable. Customer(s) can take it anywhere and take them whenever they like. One cup of tea at bedtime can significantly boost results…".

Strictly for oral administration only, of course.

This ‘danger, Splenda is toxic and anyone who eats anything sweet will surely die’ website is entirely bollocks from start to finish. One thing I love about the Internet is the number of utter nutcases who think they’re Doing Science and Saving The World, rather than scaremongering and wasting everyone’s time.

My favourite part of the whole text is "the manufacturer claims that the chlorine added to sucralose is similar to the chlorine atom in the salt (NaCl) molecule. That is not the case". What, so Splenda’s makers have added extra neutrons to their chlorine? Truly they are evil scientists…