New Beatitudes for the Religious Right

Blessed are the poor in generosity: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are they that judge: for they shall be comforted.

Blessed are the aggressive: for they shall acquire the earth.

Blessed are they which do lust in self-righteousness: for they shall be filled.

Blessed are the unmerciful: for they shall obtain mercy.

Blessed are the impure in heart: for they shall see God.

Blessed are the warmakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

Blessed are they which persecute for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

(from here via here)

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