"One of my favourite English traditions, however, is under serious threat. And not from those evil bureaucrats in the EU meddling in our affairs, not from transnational corporations sucking the blood out of communities. No, this time the enemy is definitely ‘within’.

"What tradition is this? It is, of course, that fabulous English insistence on completely ignoring St George’s Day. While other nations arrange parades, concerts, flag-wavings and general emotional excess to celebrate their national days, the English have always proudly declared their identity as a people by doing absolutely nothing."

I both like, and agree with, Third Avenue. The lack of flagwaving nationalistical bollocks is one of the things which makes me proud to be English.

Meanwhile, the fact that we’re so surprised when we win the rugby that we cut off our own bollocks is one of the things which makes me proud to be Welsh. Alongside Dirty Sanchez. Indeed, there seems to be a strong self-mutilation element to the Welsh side of my personality.